Season 7 Week 7 (Is Pumpkin Actually Good? Edition)
There’s a lot to consider when seasons change. Everyone seems to have really strong opinions on certain cultural or social aspects of each quarter of the year.
I have mainly tuned that stuff out because I am better than your average American. I laugh in the face of the Ugg wearer. Scoff at the flannel man. Turn my nose up at the PSL. That’s right, you just ran into Contrarian Man! Oh you like Fall? Ok well I think Fall sucks, and you’re dumb. Oh you like to be all cozy and comfy in your house with warming and soothing foods? Pshh whatever weirdo. Catch me outside NOT being comfy and cozy. Your Halloween decorations that make you happy? Cringe dude wow. Uh, no, I don’t go “picking apples.” I’m not a wittle baby who wants a tweat. Of course I’m well-adjusted, what kind of question is that.
Obviously sarcasm as I love Fall. And hey guess what? It’s cool to do things you enjoy and be your truest self.
Last time I wore a flannel
SHOWTIME
First up, another BIG NOONER, Michigan hosts Indiana at the Big House. Indiana has one good player, and he’s from Western. Will he have a good day against some underperforming Michigan linemen? Will Michigan hold Indiana to fewer points than Ohio State’s defense? Will this game be worth watching after the first 5 minutes? All good questions.
Also at noon, but on PEACOCK (BOOOOOO!!!!!), Ohio State travels to the ooky spooky confines of West Lafayette to play Purdue! Will Ryan Day and his offensive coaches learn from mistakes and actually try to play to their strengths?? Or will they continue to smash their heads into walls to prove a point to no one? At least Jim Knowles is showing growth. That defense is still ballin.
Our final noon game is MSU at Rutgers! Is this a sicko game? I don’t really have any idea what will happen here. Both teams seem to be bipolar, and Rutgers may be more fraudulent than we originally thought. I think MSU surprises them and actually wins this game. Is this a dumb call? Maybe, but I’m not being paid to be a smartypants.
Then, at 3:30pm, Penn State hosts UMass and the spread is 41.5 😭😭. They should have a running clock from the jump. Just get this one over with.
Western hosts Miami (OH) for homecoming! It’s much more culturally acceptable to eat a bird. Nice job there.
Central hosts Akron in the most pleasant of mounts. Kevin, if you hit a parlay for this game I’ll send you your own special little prize.
GVSU plays Ferris this week D: I am not ready for more embarrassment.
NFL x WTSBETS
The Lions are the 3rd best team in the NFC! Not 3rd best in the NFC North. 3rd best in the entirety of the NFC! We’re rocking right now. The Bucs have a great pass defense, so I guess it’s a good thing we have an electric run game too!! But, my favorite part of this Lions team is their tenacious, destructive, and rampageous defense. I am a sucker for CHAOS DEFENSE. 5-1 here we come. #RestoreTheRoar
Steelers.
