Week 1 (Kickoff Edition)
WE ARE, back.
Not only that, but we are back and better than ever!! A brand new season always brings new adventures and situations, but this year we have more than usual. We’re getting spicy across the US this year (maybe even spicy deluxe). WTS Bets National Dominance soon come.
IT’S WEEK ONE! COLLEGE FOOTBALL IS BACK, AND WE GET 5 FULL DAYS OF IT. OUR CHRISTIAN GOD MAY HAVE ABANDONED US, BUT WHO NEEDS HIM HIS SCHOOL SUCKS ANYWAY. JOIN A CONFERENCE GOD!!
Speaking of back, let’s bring back our hype video to set the tone once again because it is just so so good.
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What do you get when a school is too far up its own ass about tradition to make winning choices? That’s called a Weis Decision.
The Notre Dame “Fighting” “Irish” (they’re probably not even 25% Irish) come to THE Shoe to play THE Ohio State University Buckeyes. A top 5 matchup to kick off the season? And at night?? Yes please. Jim Knowles pls be good.
Me praying to Mr. Pom Pom
Penn State travels to the lair of PETE on Thursday night to kick off our weekend! Nothing bad ever happens in a highly anticipated night game at Purdue right? RIGHT?? James Franklin will get an extension either way so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯.
Western and MSU battle under the Friday Night Lights! However, the real matchup when MSU hosts WMU or CMU is always at Harper’s between the frat stars of each school and who can drink the most or sexually harass the bartender the most. It’s normally always a tie.
Michigan hosts Colorado State in the most boring game of our slate! Leave it to Michigan to always be a bit of a bummer.
Elsewhere, CMU plays Oklahoma State on Thursday! It’s the battle of the Michigan Sports Legend Alma Maters! Barry Sanders vs. Cooper Rush! Also, it’s the rematch to the most controversial finish I have ever seen. If you don’t know just google it. It’s bananas.
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To The Bets
It’s all college football all weekend! NFL will be with us shortly, but until then:
Crack your beverage of choice. Fire up as many screens as you can. Shirk your responsibilities, and ignore your family!! Football is back. We’re back, and regular life can WAIT!
Let’s get it!!!
