Dec 24

Dec 24 Season 4 Final Results

A time comes in everyone’s lives when the question must be answered:

What the fuck?

Genuinely. Take a moment. Sit back in your chair, couch, beanbag, toilet, whatever, and clear your other thoughts. Ask yourself: What. The. Fuck? Because I am at a loss.

Four seasons. Four full, and grueling seasons. And YET, we still don’t have a new champion. We started WTS Bets in September 2017. I was only a few months removed from working at Abercrombie. Benjamin was still a year away from fatherhood. Christopher was fresh off the greatest season in WMU Football history. Kevin got married LITERALLY THE SAME MONTH. Sully was in the middle of rooming with Jonny. KAIT AND JONATHAN WEREN’T EVEN DATING. Through all of this one thing stayed the same: Jonny at #1.

The NBA in the 1990’s was considered the fight for the right to lose to MJ and the Bulls. Well, WTS Bets has reached that point as well, but with JK. Good luck on winning that silver medal, y’all. Gold is reserved.

Before we get to the inevitable, I would be remiss to not formally announce the winner of our game show week!!

The winner of Week 14 and the custom engraved growler is:

Kevin Robert Pohl

If there’s one thing we learned from Kevin over the past few seasons, it’s that he’s very much like LeBron. Coasting until the playoffs, then bang he wins again. I am not posting the full results of last week’s contest because Kevin got 3 answers correct and that was 50% of all correct answers lol. Better luck next time, everyone else.

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Now, to announce the winner of WTS Bets Season 4. An interesting tidbit about this season is that before college football came into the equation, our champion looked out of gas. But like Kevin and Lebron, he was just utilizing ✨ Load Management ✨. Your Season 4 Champion is, who else:

Jonathan “I’m Gonna Lose This Season” Koval

There really isn’t that much more to say about our champion. 4 years, 4 rings. Who else has done that? Bill Russell, Michael Jordan, and that is it. Well, also U of M from 1901-1904. But are we going to count the years when they played literal high school teams? Rather poignant though, as it seems as Jonathan is D1 and the rest of us are MHSAA/OHSAA/PIAA (except for Kevin he was home schooled).

Finishing in 2nd for the second time in three years, is Chris Sullivan! Narrowly besting Kait by 0.29 points. Sully may have been absent for a few weeks, silent in the chat, and mostly keeping to himself, BUT he was there. Watching. Waiting. Biding his time. Summoning the power of the newly revitalized B R O W N S!! It paid off. Congrats Chris, you’re almost there. Can I get one final Dawg Check? Amen.

Ever consistent, Kait finished in 3rd for the second straight year! While the conclusion of her season wasn’t exactly what she wanted, she still took a spot on the podium. The Co-Commissioner is generous to let others finish ahead of her. Top 3 is great, and she would have probably done better if she asked 538,339 questions, but alas, she only asked 538,338. However, I have one last question for our Question Master: How silly is this Juju situation? It’s a non-issue, but that hit was pretty good. I hope the Steelers face the Browns in the playoffs, and after overtime, Juju and Baker have a dance-off to see who goes to the Super Bowl. Hit that nae nae for the millionth time, Baker. Definitely still cool.

Tying his personal best finish of 4th Place, is Benjamin! This season has been a complete trash fire for both of his football teams. I mean, literally couldn’t have gone more poorly. Michigan hasn’t been this embarrassing in AT LEAST 2 years. However, Benjamin did what Don Brown couldn’t. He adjusted. Benj had a lot of ups and downs this year. But he made sure to never string too many of those downs together. Hire Benjamin as a Quality Control Coach, Michigan. You’ll learn a few things.

A fall for the ages. A performance so underwhelming, U of M is considering giving me a lifetime contract. After barely missing out on a Season 3 Championship, I followed that up with a struggle to even finish 5th. While this year taught me many lessons, the most important one I learned is thus:

I create the questions each week. Structure the formulas, review the data. And this is the best I can do? FIFTH? I am my own worst enemy. However, next year is most assuredly my year because I vow to cheat.

In 6th is Kevin! He is the master of the sneak attack. Finishing nearly last in both 2019 and 2020. Yet winning our Tournament, and Winner Take All competition. He must have learned these skills while emulating Legolas and Haldir in his backyard woods. Also, we need to talk about how we didn’t see his guy’s face for months and all of a sudden he’s rocking some glorious facial hair. Welcome to the club, big fella. Our president is Christopher.

In last, but most certainly not least, is the only man who knows when to and when to not hot key. It’s Christopher! He and Kevin swapped places from last year. However, it is rather interesting that both Tournament winners seem to finish last in the regular season. That’s what I call parity. Christopher struggled a bit this season due to his blind loyalty to that team in Detroit. But I know he has learned his lesson. Also, maybe next year will be better? Please? At least he has the Bucks and Broncos. Question, who wins: 2012 Undefeated Ohio State with Braxton Miller or 2016 Undefeated Western Michigan? Time to fire up the PS3.

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We all know what this year was like, so I won’t continue to broadly talk about “all the stuff” that happened. However, I did want to say thank you to all of you for another super fun and thrilling season. This was definitely a bright spot of 2020. Even though this is quite a lot of work for one person, I still look forward to each week, and sharing this experience with you. I will be getting the league and website trademarked in 2021 (or LLC). The future is bright for all of us here at WTS Bets. Here’s to Season 5.

Merry Christmas.

Results are below.