So, last week was a metaphorical turd claymore and I tripped that sucker with my face. But, hey at least my Bucks are here to pick me up when I’m down….wait what?

At least I have work? LMFAO. Another week, another commendation by my VP for “kicking ass”. She said that out loud in a meeting to another VP about me this week. Workin’ smarter and most assuredly not harder. But hey, I’ll take it. It gives me more time to work on the league and keep things funky fresh around here.

Kevin, if you need a Project Manager, hit me up.

Elon, if you need a guy who uh, uh, collects a big paycheck, hit me up.

****

SHOWTIME

Arkansas State vs. #17 Michigan, Saturday 12:00 pm EST on BTN

Wolverine in the comics can take insane damage or injury, and regenerate back to super strength in a matter of minutes, if not seconds. In comparison, the Wolverines in Ann Arbor needed 25 years to regenerate. Another 25 on the horizon? Maybe they can take out some of their anger on Butch Jones and Arkansas State to feel a little better. Maybe this will help Fartindale stink a little less too. Will Johnson gets another Pick 6. I also don’t think all is lost for Michigan fwiw.

Prairie View A&M vs. Michigan State, Saturday 3:30 pm EST on BTN

Another tune up game on the slate this weekend (What are we the SEC now??). Anything of note here? No, it’s Prairie View. But let’s see the Freshman and Sophomore connection between Chiles and Marsh continue to grow. I like Marsh a lot, but if he keeps getting praise as the best Freshman WR in the B1G by some, I will have no choice but to return to my MSU hater days of the early twenty-teens.

Central Michigan vs. Illinois, Saturday 12:00 pm EST on P’cock

Bloodbath incoming. Think opening scene of Blade. Illinois’ defense is very good lol.

NC Central vs. North Carolina, Saturday 6:00 pm EST on ESPN+

Is this a rivalry?? Does NC Central also have a good basketball team? It seems like every school in the state is at least competitive when it comes to basketball. For football though? roflmao. Tar Heels will most likely take these boys to the woodshed. Another snoozer on the docket gosh darn it. Hopefully Hampton is fully healthy this week at least.

Bethune Cookman vs. Western Michigan, Saturday 6:30 pm EST on ESPN+

Man, our slate of games this weekend is PUTRID. But, hopefully the Broncos can pass the 100 yard threshold for total offense this weekend. That would be a small victory compared to last weekend. Also, let’s get Buckley back so he can run for 300 against a FCS team. Give me something fun to watch, PLEASE.

#3 Grand Valley vs. #22 Colorado State Pueblo, Saturday 8:00 pm EST

Lakerssss baby! After a dominant first game, your favorite D2 ballers head to the great state of Colorado for a Top 25 matchup with Beau Briske’s alma mater, Colorado State Pueblo! They play in the ThunderBowl, but GVSU is the storm this Saturday. #AnchorUp

NFL x WTSBETS

My dad got Lions tickets for his birthday this year (shoutout to Jonny and Mom). And since I am the last son in the state, I will be going with him. I cannot wait to scream at Baker Mayfield for 4 hours. I don’t even need and $7 Ford Field beers to yell at him that his dancing sucks. I used to hate him sharply when he threw that terrible pick to keep us out of the playoffs. But then, poetically, we picked him off to advance to the NFC Championship the very next year. What a bro move, thanks Bake.

The Panthers take on JK Dobbins and the Chargers at 1pm. I will be rooting for JK to run for 200 yards, and for Jim Harbaugh to lose again. He deserves nothing more. Can the Panthers’ little guy finally put on his big boy pants and lead them to a decisive victory? Maybe!