It feels so good to have college football back. Yesterday was so fun. I am very hungover as I write this, but it’s worth it. High Life #2 (beer #5) inspired me to get Bre to drive us downtown to get drinks with friends, and watch football at our favorite brewery. My body can’t keep up with my heart. But, like all of our teams this weekend, a little tune up for the full season is necessary.

We’re back in the game y’all. Let’s go.

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The “Hail” chant, the cringy and unnecessary tributes, the self-righteous delusion. “We’re not in a cult” they say. Ok well stop doing cult things. If you have a Michigan fan in your life, please talk to them before it’s too late. The next move is cutting off communication. Be there for your most vulnerable.

The Cult Boys had a mildly slow start against ECU, but corrected course rather easily and smoothly. Some concerns on the OL and a few other spots kinda but it’s Week 1. They’ll be fine.

Speaking of OL concerns. Your THE OHIO STATE BUCKEYES actually played a conference game to start their season. Things look very good on Defense, and hopefully the blocking issues can get worked out for the OL. But, the Buckeyes looked fine against a desperate Indiana. Andre Carter go back to Western please, my god.

The Broncos handled business with Saint Francis on Thursday. Even with their best players transferring out, Western looked cohesive. Beat CMU this year??

MSU looked NAUSEATING for one full half against CMU on Thursday. Next time you need a charcoal milkshake, just replace it with the tape of this game’s first half and you’ll purge no problem. At least things got better in the 2nd for ol’ Sparty. A win is a win.

I apologize to our Co-Comm as I did not watch a single second of the Penn State/WVU game. Good win though apparently. We Are!

GVSU lost. It’s so over.

RESULTS

A blond Koval does it again. This time with extra height!!

Your Week 1 winner is:

Ethan

His first full season is off to a blazing start! He’s definitely on a heater lately, 2 chip-in birdies when we golfed last week, and now easily bagging a win in Week 1. Ethan went 4-6 and won $0.84.

In 2nd is Kait! Back in Happy Valley, and back in 2nd place. The more things change….she went 2-8 and won $0.75.

In 3rd is Benjamin! Slow start like the Wolverines, but finished the weekend off nicely. He went 2-8 and won $0.44!

In 4th is Nick! In hilarious fashion, Nick had a rough time getting questions right, but ended the weekend without losing any money. Universe called a mulligan for him. Fresh start next week! He went 2-8 and won $0.00.

🚨 WARNING! NORTHWESTERN ZONE AHEAD!! PROCEED WITH CAUTION! 🚨

In 5th is Jonathan. At least you got on TV big guy. He went 1-9 and lost $0.07.

In 6th is Me. 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 I went 0-10 and lost $0.19

In 7th is Señor Halcón. Sorry buddy you bet on a FCS team for the BH and now your world has been turned upside down. They say #RiseUp in ATL, so I know you’ll do just that. Christopher went 2-8 and lost $0.35

In 8th is Kevin. Also bet on a FCS team for the Big Huge. Sorry man. You still lead the league in most creative burgers grilled, and for that I salute you. He went 3-7 and lost $0.55

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More football next weekend let’s gooooooooo!! Games may not be that exciting for any of our teams. But, it’s still football, and brother I ain’t complainin’

Results are below!