A boring, yet fulfilling weekend. I think that’s what our teams needed (not you MSU sorry. You need much more than that). But, no real surprises or issues. Let’s just get right, and get prepped for the meat of our schedules!

Unless you are Michigan. In which case you’ll only start prepping for that in like Week 11.

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Michigan showed Nebraska no mercy. So, they cruised to a huge blowout win that could not hold my attention. Michigan looks like they are on a slow death march towards the CFP like last year. They have yet to have an Illinois game, but they also haven’t played anyone with a pulse. Yes, I am still scared of them.

I watched Tropic Thunder instead of the MSU/Iowa game 👍🏻. Still funny.

Penn State had a mini Franklining on their hands against Northwestern. They ended up blowing them out, but I don’t like seeing that side of the Nittany Lions. It’s like JJ’s Dumb Brett Favre Side**. You’re not supposed to have that in you anymore!!! I thought we moved past this. Guess not. Hang on tight.

CMU got a quality MAC win against EMU!! Don’t look any further! Thank you!

Western WHOOPED Ball State. Ball State had barbeque back there, but forgot to inform the Broncos.

GVSU showed SVSU yet again that they are THE TRUE VALLEY SCHOOL!! Bums. Also, who would ever live in Saginaw willingly? Disgusting. (Do not tell Bre I said this).

Columbia fell to Princeton 7-10 in what I can only assume was a game played in leather helmets. Is Princeton harder to get into? Harder to get into their red zone at least.

NFL

Lions are winning the Super Bowl. End of discussion. Also, the Packers are whiny baby losers and still reek of low quality Wisconsin cheese.

** Yes, I realize combining Dumb and Brett Favre is redundant

RESULTS

This is his week.

Your Week 5 winner is:

Benjamin

His crying may have been ugly as he watched Miggy ride off into the sunset, but Benj’s performance this week was anything but. He allocated his pennies properly, and hit the BH as well. He went 3-7 and won $0.94.

However, that’s not it. Not even close. A momentous shift took place with our leaderboard. Benjamin usurped Jonny and is now #1 Overall. Kait came into the week ranked #2, and fell all the way down to 4th. I had a huge week and jumped from 6th to 3rd! And even with a very good week, Ethan went from 4th down to 6th. Total chaos this week. Things are getting spicy.

Ok back to this week’s results!

In 2nd is Nick! Maybe being in/near New York DOES make you better than everyone?? He went 2-8 and won $0.77.

In 3rd is yours truly. I’m coming for y’all. Whether I have to rig this thing again or not. I went 5-5 and won $0.76.

In 4th is Ethan! He had the best week in terms of Win-Loss record, but still slid down the rankings. Seems to be a major theme this year. He went 6-4 and won $0.12.

In 5th is Jonny! Flash flood and running into Jackson Mahomes? He was destined to have a rough time. he went 4-6 and won $0.04.

In 6th is Christopher. He, uh, he’s….handsome? He went 2-8 and lost $0.03.

🚨 WARNING! MSU ADMINISTRATIVE DECISION MAKING ZONE AHEAD!! PROCEED WITH CAUTION! 🚨

In 7th is Kait. She went home to Pittsburgh and must’ve gotten that Matt Canada stank on her. She went 2-8 and lost $0.29.

In 8th is Kevin. Again. Again. A proud father. A devoted family man. A highly successful man in his career. A HORRIBLE micro-bettor. Keep it up big guy. He went 2-8 and lost $0.35.

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Week 6 has some fun matchups, and MSU is on a bye! So, everyone can be happier than usual this coming weekend! Yay!!

Results are below!